Nephalem, you should stay a while and listen to this latest recipe!

After much planning and thinking, I’m ready to go on my next culinary adventure in Sanctuary with a brand new series called “Sanctuary Sliders”. My goal is to create sliders representing regions, monsters, and residents of Sanctuary.

It’ll be a very ambitious project, but I think I’m geared up enough to do it! If you wanna pass a few pieces of gold my way to support this project and the blog, please visit my Patreon.

We’re starting series off with where it all begins in Diablo III — New Tristram!

I’ve gone and gathered the best ingredients I could for these special sliders:

• Mushrooms, arugula, tomatoes and onions from the Forlorn Farm…
• Beef sourced from only the finest place that totally is Not the Cow Level…
• Ale from the lovely Slaughtered Calf Inn…
• And local goat cheese acquired from the goat…men? Um…Yeah…

Well, let’s get cooking!

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. salt
2. pepper
3. 2 tablespoons of worcestershire
4. 3 tablespoons of olive oil
5. 2 cups of ale
6. 5 cloves of garlic, chopped
7. 1 cup of mushrooms, sliced
8. 1 small red onion, sliced
9. 1 steak tomato, sliced
10. chevre goat cheese
11. 2 cups of arugula
12. 6 small ciabatta rolls
13. 2 lbs of lean ground beef (I used 94/6)

BUILD ORDER

Prep time for this recipe is about 20 minutes. Cook time is about 35 minutes. This will make about 6 sliders.

OPENING

1. Set a pan on high heat.
2. Add in 1 tablespoon of olive oil.
3. Saute your onions and mushrooms for about 2 minutes.
4. Reduce the heat to medium.
5. Add in 1/2 cup of your ale. Allow the ale to cook out for about 3 minutes.
6. Remove the vegetables the pan and set aside.
7. Using a damp towel, wipe away any charred vegetable bits.

MID GAME

1. In a large bowl, combine your ground beef with your worcestershire sauce and chopped garlic.
2. Add in salt and pepper.
3. Add in your remaining ale and stir it into the mix.
   
4. Begin shaping the meat into burger patties. Use a spoon to help portion out the meat. You’ll want to take about 2 spoonfuls of meat. Roll that into a ball and firmly press it flat with your hands.
5. Continue doing this until you have 6 large patties. Remember, these patties will shrink during cooking!

LATE GAME

1. Set a pan on high heat and add 1 tablespoon of olive oil.
2. Once it’s come up to heat, add in 3 – 4 patties (depending on the size of your pan).
3. Let them cook on one side for about 5 minutes. Flip and cook the other side for 5 minutes. The ale will bubble out of the meat at this time. Once done, remove them from the heat and set aside.
   
4. While the patties are cooking, place the ciabatta rolls in the oven at 350° for about 2-3 minutes to toast them. Remove them from the oven and cut them open.
5. Begin building your sliders! Spread the goat cheese on top of the burger patty so it melts. Add your caramelized onions and mushrooms over the goat cheese. You can place the remaining vegetables how ever you’d like.
   
6. Eat!

NEPHALEM, gg wp!

Now you can sit back, relax and an enjoy a good book with your sliders. You may even want to consider staying a while and listening… ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

The incredible Meru also took some gorgeous photos for your enjoyment. <3 Feast your eyes on the following food porn:

drool

These sliders will keep your tummy happy while you battle the onslaught of demons!

I hope you’ve enjoyed the first installment of this multi-part recipe series. Stay tuned for the next Sanctuary Sliders! See you around, Nephalem!

It’s been a pretty hot summer here, so anything frozen is a welcomed refreshment. With the new season of Diablo underway, it was time to create a chilling dish that would combat the heat from the Burning Hells.

JUSTICE is best served cold! Right Tyrael?

This recipe is pretty easy, so you’ll be able to whip it up between your rift runs! Plus, it’s got a little bit of booze in it. A nice way to end summer with one last tropical cocktail!

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. 2 oz of blue curacao
2. 3 oz of rum
3. 1 cup of pineapples, chopped
4. 3 – 4 pineapple spears
5. 1 can of coconut cream

BUILD ORDER

Prep time for this recipe is about 15 minutes. Chill time is about 8 hours (~6 hours without alcohol). This will make about 6 popsicles.

You will want a popsicle mold that has a removable shell. I’m using Zoku popsicle makers for this. This can be done with a standard mold, but it may be a bit trickier!

OPENING

1. Take your pineapple spears and cut them into strips. The goal is to create rays of light similar to this:
   
2. Once you’re happy with the shape and size of the pineapple rays, place them inside the popsicle mold.
3. Place the molds face down in the freezer and let the pineapple harden for about 5 minutes.
4. Any left over pineapple pieces from this process can be added into the next step!

MID GAME

1. While your pineapples are freezing, combine your pineapples, coconut cream, and rum in a blender.
2. Remove your molds from the freezer. Place the molds in their holder so they’re standing up straight.
3. Slowly pour in the mixture into each mold.

LATE GAME

1. Carefully pour blue curacao into each mold. Since the piña colada mixture is dense, the curacao should easily sit on top of it.
2. Using a chopstick or knife, gently poke the curacao into the piña colada mix. You’ll want to focus mainly on the edges of the popsicle mold in order to make the blue color more prominent. This is the same technique used for the burning hells popsicles.
3. Return the popsicles to the freezer and allow it to chill for about 8 hours.
4. When the popsicles are ready, use warm water to help ease the popsicles out of their molds.
5. Eat!

Now you’ve got a cool treat worthy of the Angels. GG WP!

Now, get back to rifting! See you in Sanctuary, Nephalem!

The weather has been heating up which means that summer is upon us! You know what will cool you down in the heat? POPSICLES!

So, I invited an honorable guest to help me create these frozen delicacies… And let me tell you, he sure knows a thing or two about how to deal with the heat!

Tiny bourbon for a tiny Lord of Terror.

I imagine that it must get pretty damn hot in the Burning Hells, and I would think that Diablo likes to enjoy a good cocktail or two while he’s plotting the demise of the Nephalem. I always knew he was an Old Fashioned kind of demon.

For this recipe, instead of going with something spicy to burn your mouth , I decided to go with a different type of burn: BOOZE!

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. 1 oz of bitters
2. 3 oz of bourbon
3. 1 cup of cherries, pitted
4. 2 cups of orange juice
5. 1 peach, chopped
6. OPTIONAL: sweetener of your choice*

*These popsicles are a little bit on the tart side, if you want it to be sweeter, feel free to add 1/2 tablespoon to each of the mixtures before freezing.

BUILD ORDER

Total prep time for this recipe is about 20 minutes. Total idle time is about 8 hours (or 5 – 6 hours if you make this without the alcohol).
This makes about 6 popsicles.

OPENING

1. Combine your chopped peach and 1 cup of orange juice in a blender. Add in 1/2 of your bitters and bourbon.
2. Blend the mixture and set aside.

MID GAME

1. Combine your remaining orange juice, bourbon, bitters and cherries in a blender.
2. Blend the mixture and set aside. The cherry mixture should be less viscous than the peach mixture.

LATE GAME

1. Begin pouring in your orange and peach mixture into each popsicle mold. You’ll want to fill it up to 2/3 of the mold.
2. Top off each mold with the cherry mixture. Using a chopstick or knife, poke the cherry mixture into the peach mixture. This will cause the cherry color to bleed into the orange color.
3. Let chill for 8 hours.
4. Remove the popsicles from the mold.
5. Eat!

GG WP!

Since this recipe does contain alcohol, I do recommend making these popsicles right before you sleep since alcohol takes a much longer time to freeze. As a result, they’ll also defrost faster once you take them out, so eat them quickly!

If you don’t like alcohol, or if you want to make this kid-friendly, this recipe works great without the bourbon and bitters. You’ll just need to add a little bit more orange juice.

Now, go forth and enjoy the warm weather, Nephalem!

I’ve been spending a fair amount of time playing Diablo III recently. It’s the 3rd season, and with every season, there’s always a new build for each class. For the past 3 seasons, I’ve always stuck to playing Demon Hunter and only Demon Hunter. #DHLIFE

I’m super creative with names too.

The build that seems to be the latest hotness is the Natalya’s set. Not only does it do insane damage, but you look super cool doing it. Your DH probably gets super dizzy though…

SPIN TO WIN ISN’T JUST FOR BARBS ANYMORE!

This 3rd season also happens to fall during the 3rd anniversary of Diablo III. HOW PECULIAR. Diablo Life 3 confirmed. 

In honor of their anniversary, I decided to bake up something sweet. It’s something that you could nibble on during your Greater Rift runs. It’s the edible form of Greater Rift Keys!

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. pinch of salt
2. 1 teaspoon of vanilla
3. 1 tablespoon of agave (feel free to adjust this depending on how sweet you like your cookies)
4. 1 tablespoon of coconut oil, melted
5. zest from 1/2 a lemon
6. 1 1/4 cup of blueberries
7. 2 eggs
8. 2 tablespoons of lemon curd
9. 1 cup of coconut flour

recipe adapted from detoxinista.com 

Since this recipe is using coconut flour, it’s gluten-free! Hooray!
Wanna make it vegan? Substitute 1 banana for the 2 eggs.

BUILD ORDER

Prep time for this recipe takes about 10 minutes. Decorating time is about 10 minutes. Cook time is about 15 minutes. This makes about 10 cookies.

OPENING

1. In a large bowl, combine your salt, flour, lemon zest, coconut oil, eggs, vanilla and agave.
2. Stir until thoroughly combined.

MID GAME

1. Puree your blueberries.
   
2. Add it into your batter. This will give the keystones a purple color.
3. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
4. Scoop out golf-ball sized balls from the batter. Shape them to look like keystones.
   

LATE GAME

1. Pre-heat your oven to 350°.
2. Using a chopstick or knife, carve out numbers (I choose 3 just because it’s the 3rd anniversary) or infinity symbols.
3. Place your lemon curd in a ziplock bag. Cut off the end. Pipe the curd into the carvings.
   
4. Use a butter knife to smooth out the designs and the cookies.
   
5. Bake for 13 – 15 minutes.
6. Eat!

Now, you’re ready to tackle rifts! GG WP, Nephalem.

Now, you can enjoy these tasty little treats all by yourself with a cup of your favorite tea. Or, you can share them with some friends from Sanctuary.

Happy 3rd anniversary, Diablo III! Hope your birthday week is full of not cows… I mean, why would you even bring that up? There’s no cows ever.

[tweet https://twitter.com/kierpanda/status/514235954047893504 width=’600′]

I have spent my shopping days wandering the aisles of various stores looking for their most pumpkiny of offerings. I assume that my apartment will soon be covered by a thin film of pumpkin spice flavor for the duration of fall.

[tweet https://twitter.com/kierpanda/status/516791705149140992 width=’600′]

I enjoy pumpkin spice so much that the very talented @Urgoslav made me a gif compiling some delectable pumpkin spice treasures that I’ve posted to my Twitter.

[tweet https://twitter.com/Urgoslav/status/514607282605158400 width=’600′]

 So when Lylirra informed me about this thread, I went into a pumpkin spice fueled fury. DIABLO and PUMPKIN SPICE? Two of my most favoritest things in the world combined into one delicious and healthy treat? WHY YES, NEPHALEM.

Little Lord of Terror makes a new friend!

It has been oddly hot here in Northern California, so a refreshing smoothie is something I needed to beat this heatwave.

Much like my last bottomless potion recipe, Bottomless Potion of Kulle-Aid, this Bottomless Potion of Pumpkin Spice will also be a very simple-to-make drink.

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. 1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon
2. 1/4 teaspoon of ginger
3. 1/8 teaspoon of cloves
4. 1/8 teaspoon of nutmeg
5. 1/2 tablespoon of honey (substitute agave to make it vegan!)
6. 2 teaspoons of chia seeds
7. 1 cup of almond milk (substitute for regular milk, soy, or coconut milk)
8. 3/4 cup of canned pumpkin

You can also use pumpkin pie spice instead of getting cinnamon, ginger, cloves, and nutmeg. Just use about 3/4 teaspoon of pumpkin pie spice.

BUILD ORDER

Prep time for this is about 15 minutes. This makes 2 servings.

1. Combine your cinnamon, ginger, cloves, and nutmeg.
2. Pour your pumpkin and spices into a blender. Drizzle in your honey.
3. Pour in your chia seeds.
4. Begin blending your pumpkin smoothie while slowly pouring in your almond milk. Blend until thoroughly combined.
5. Enjoy!

This smoothie will taste like a big ol’ pumpkin pie in your cup. Enjoy it for breakfast, lunch, dinner or anytime you need to quell your pumpkin spice cravings!

Not only is this smoothie very easy to craft, but it’s very nutritious for you as well. Chia seeds and pumpkin are both full of fiber. It’s the perfect hands-free nutrition you need to squash your hunger while squashing the demons of hell.

So drink up, Nephalem!

See you in Sanctuary!

So, I invited the Prime Evil himself to join us for a pre-birthday dinner:

You’re so much cuter in person!

For this prime rib, I decided to try something different with the sauce, so I opted for a sweeter sauce that uses port wine as a base. Aww yissss. If you want a more traditional sauce, I recommend going for the tried-and-true aus jus sauce.

Cooking a standing rib roast sounds like it might be a Torment IV-level culinary challenge, but it’s actually pretty simple. It just takes some patience, some prep work, and some good technology!

UNIT COMPOSITION

For the prime rib:

1. salt
2. pepper
3. 1 tablespoon of olive oil
4. 4lb standing rib roast, bones cut away and tied (your butcher can do this for you)
   

MEAT GOOD!

For the sides:

1. salt
2. 3 tablespoons of butter
3. 1 cup of milk
4. 1 head of garlic
5. 1/2 cup of asiago cheese or shredded parmesan
6. 1 1/2 lbs of red potatoes, cleaned and chopped into quarters
7. 1/2 lb of asparagus

For the sauce:

1. 1/2 cup of port wine
2. 1 cup of cherry preserves

Note: I highly recommend using a probe thermometer for this recipe! I have this one.

The reason is that prime rib roasts come in all shapes and sizes, which means that cooking times will vary based off the size and the temperature consistency of your oven. By using a probe thermometer, you will be able to know when your roast reaches the correct temperature (and desired done-ness):

via What’s Cooking America

BUILD ORDER

Allow the rib roast to come up to room temperature for about 3-4 hours prior to cooking. Prep time for this dish will take about 1 hour. Total cook time for the roast can range from 1hr – 2hrs. Cook time for the sides is about 40 minutes. This dish will make about 3-4 servings.

If you would like to roast a larger rib roast, it’ll roughly be about 1 rib for 2 people (1 rib is roughly 2lbs). A rough estimate for total cooking time is roughly about 15 – 18 minutes per pound, HOWEVER, use a meat thermometer as your guide for when you should remove the roast from the oven. Once the roast has hit it’s target temperature (view the “Level of Doneness” chart above), you should take it out of the oven.

I recommend purchasing your rib roast ahead of time so you can dry-age it in your refrigerator (set your temp to about 40°F). Dry-aging the meat will get rid of excess moisture and will intensify the flavor of the meat — basically your meat will be more meaty.

The Butcher recommends that you dry-age your meat when you can!

To dry-age your rib roast, place your rib roast on a cooling rack in a baking dish. Wrap your rib roast in paper towels (or cheese cloth) and place your rib roast in the fridge. Change the towels every 24 hours.

You can dry-age your rib roast for a week in your fridge (you may need to trim away the uber-dry parts of the rib roast). I kind of waited until the last minute to pick up my rib roast, so mine only had about 3 days of dry-aging.

OPENING

1. Pre-heat your oven to 500°F. 
2. Season your rib roast with salt and pepper. Rub your olive oil into the rib roast.
3. Place the probe of your thermometer in the thickest part the meat (not touching the bone).
4. Once your oven has come up to temperature, place your rib roast in the oven. Allow it cook for about 5 minutes at this temperature, and then immediately drop the temperature to 325°F. The high heat is used to build a crust on the roast. 
5. Place a head of garlic wrapped in foil in your oven (you can place this directly on the rack). The garlic will be used for your mashed potatoes.
6. Allow the roast to cook until it reaches its desired level of doneness/target temperature (program your thermometer to beep at the desired temperature). While the rib roast is cooking, prepare your sides.

MID GAME

1. Set a pot of water to boil. While the water is still cold, add in your chopped red potatoes. Season the water with salt.
2. Allow the potatoes to boil for about 10 minutes, or until soft. Strain the potatoes and add the potatoes back to the pot.
3. Add in your cheese, milk, and butter.
4. Remove your garlic from the oven and peel away the skin — be careful, because it will still be hot!
5. Add in 3-5 roasted garlic cloves into your potatoes and mash to combine. Keep warm until the roast is ready to be served.
6. Prepare your asparagus and gently steam them over hot water for about 6 minutes.

LATE GAME

1. Once the roast has reached the target temperature, remove it from the oven and place it on a separate plate. Allow the roast to rest for about 10 – 15 minutes. The roast will continue cooking while it’s resting.
2. Strain the excess oil from the roasting pan and add the drippings into a sauce pan (if you didn’t use foil in your roasting pan, you can cook your sauce directly in the roasting pan over your stove).
3. Heat your sauce pan on medium heat and add in your port wine.
4. Add in your cherry preserves and stir until combined. Allow the sauce to reduce.
5. Once the roast has finished resting, move it to a cutting board. Carefully cut the rib bones away from the roast (if you had your butcher pre-cut the bone away and tie it, this part will be super easy).
6. Slice your roast into 1/2 inch pieces. Plate with your sides and serve with your cherry port wine sauce.
7. Eat!

Once plated, you should have something that looks sort of like this:

GG WP, Nephalem!

And here’s the prime rib drenched in the diabolical sauce. MEAT GOOD!

And of course, here’s a shot of Diablo enjoying his own special meal! HOW TASTES YOUR ROAST, NEPHALEM?

If you’re looking for a dessert to celebrate Diablo III’s birthday, check out what I made last year: Heart of Sin Cakes!

Happy Birthday, Diablo III!

A few weeks ago, Waterfiend, suggested that I make something special for the upcoming release of Reaper of Souls. That suggestion was to create a version of the delicious RoS consumable Bottomless Potion of Kulle-Aid.

OH YEAH. 

I have been in many scenarios where being able to smash my way through walls would have been very, very helpful.

WOW, THIS SEEMS FAIR. ಠ_ಠ

Unfortunately, this real-life version of Kulle-Aid won’t allow you to run through walls, BUT, it will provide you the refreshment you need to fight through Act V!

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. 2 teaspoons of honey
2. 2 hibiscus tea bags
3. juice from 3 limes
4. ~2 cups of club soda

BUILD ORDER

1. Brew your hibiscus tea in about 6oz of water.
2. Add in your honey and stir until combined.
3. Add ice cubes to your brewed tea. Add in your lime juice.
4. Pour about 1/2 cup of your hibiscus tea and lime juice mixture into a glass. Top off your glass with equal parts club soda.
5. Enjoy!

GG WP!

If you’re looking for a more adult version of this drink (aka, BOOZE!), I recommend adding a shot or two of shochu.

Now, if you want to up your cooking game and create a devilish spread for your RoS launch party, here are my Diablo-themed recipes:

Appetizers/Starters

• Treasure Goblin Bags [curried turkey stuffed wontons]
• Parsnips of Reflection [parsnips and turmeric soup]
• Wishful Essence [cauliflower bacon soup]
• Caprese of Cinders [avocado caprese salad]

Entrees

• Reaper of Soles [black sesame seed crusted sole over stir fry] How appropriate!!
• Diablo III Chili [triple pepper chili]
• Healthy Globes [quinoa stuffed tomatoes]
• Suppressive Fire Multishot Chicken [roasted ginger burbon chicken]
• The Horadric Hamburger [jalapeño burger]
• Archon’s Crit Mass Burritos [carne asada burritos]

Desserts

• Heart of Sin Cakes [red velvet lava cakes]

Hope you have a happy Reapers of Souls launch day!

Wait! Come back! 

When you eventually catch up to the little bugger and mug him of all his goods, you might be lucky enough to get a Legendary! WORTH IT.

Recently, I came across the all-mighty PUZZLE RING. It was a minor upgrade from my old ring, but more importantly, it gave me a faithful Treasure Goblin side kick. I’ve affectionately named him Gibbles, because reasons.

BEST FRIENDS WITH THE BIG SCARY PUPPY.

With the Puzzle Ring equipped, your Treasure Goblin companion will eagerly pick up common items. When he picks up 13 commons, he’ll drop a rare or legendary item.

This has caused me to be come fairly obsessive when it’s comes to feeding my Treasure Goblin. I have died many times desperately trying to rush through mobs in order to get to an Armor Rack just so I could get another common item. I have definitely gotten many more legendaries farming normally than I have trying to feed my Treasure Goblin…. Maybe I should re-evaluate this strategy. Hmm…

Farming for legendaries does make me quite hungry, and you definitely can’t go hunting loot on an empty stomach. So, I’ve devised a GLORIOUS appetizer that is perfect for your next legendary adventure: Treasure Goblin Bags! These bags are stuffed with the nutrients you need to keep slayin’ demons.

Since my Treasure Goblin buddy, Gibbles, only exists in-game, I’ve enlisted the help of Lewt the Papercraft Treasure Goblin to be my trusty sous chef for the day.

Let’s get cooking!

UNIT COMPOSITION

1. salt
2. pepper
3. 1/4 cup of chives, chopped
4. 2 tablespoons of curry powder
5. 1/2 lb of ground turkey*
6. 1 cup of carrot/broccoli slaw, minced (reserve a few pieces for decoration)
7. ~20 wonton sheets

*You can substitute tofu for the turkey to make this vegetarian friendly!

BUILD ORDER

Prep time is roughly 25 minutes. Cook time is about ~12 minutes. This will make 4 servings.

OPENING

1. In a bowl, combine your salt, pepper, curry powder, chives, and chopped broccoli/carrot slaw with your ground turkey.
2. Stir until thoroughly combined.

MID GAME

1. Take one wonton wrapper and place about a tablespoon of filling in the center of the wrapper.
2. Dip your finger in water and moisten two edges of the wrapper.
3. Fold the corners to create a triangle.
4. Take the two bottom corners of the triangle and fold them to the center.
   Place two sticks of carrot or broccoli from your slaw between the gaps. Crimp the edges at the top to form a small satchel shape.

LATE GAME

1. Preheat your oven to 400° F (~204° C).
2. Place your treasure goblin bags on a baking tray and bake for about 12 minutes.
3. Remove from oven and let cool for about 3 minutes.
4. Eat!

Ta-da! GG WP. Now you’ll have these delicious appetizers full of legendary deliciousness.

Make sure you eat these quickly because you’ll never know when a Treasure Goblin might run off with them!

Hey, whats in the bag? Oh, more bags.